


The Best Way to Murder a Date Night

by LizardOnIce27



Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-25
Updated: 2014-01-25
Packaged: 2018-01-09 23:44:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1152247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LizardOnIce27/pseuds/LizardOnIce27
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pete and Patrick have a night alone planned, but that is quickly derailed when they get  back to the bus and find a corpse.</p><p>Prompt fic</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Best Way to Murder a Date Night

Pete and I walk back to our bus, hand in hand. Andy and Joe have decided to crash on another bus because they don’t want to deal with our sexually frustrated whining. Not that either of us mind, having the bus alone is a rarity, and it’s even worse when you’re dating someone on the bus. Sex is limited because of the rare hotel nights, and even rarer instances when Andy and Joe are out of the bus, and we’re not all busy. So tonight, sex is going to happen. Pete’s exact words, and I’m not going to argue. We left earlier to eat at a diner, and we planned on seeing a movie, but nothing is playing that we want to see more than each other naked. So we started walking straight back to the bus. Pete opens the door for me with a cheesy grin, and I roll my eyes at him playfully before climbing up the steps. Andy or Joe must’ve spilled something while we were gone, because the stairs are slippery and I almost slip and fall, but I catch myself on the handrail. Pete’s right behind me, so close I can feel his breath on my neck. I shiver and turn to look at him, walking backwards.

“Did you lock the door?” I pull him close by the collar of his shirt.

He leans in eagerly, “Sure, let’s go with that.”

I roll my eyes, “Lock the door.” and let go of his shirt, before turning back around to walk over to the bunks.

I trip suddenly over what feels like one of our bags of clothes, “Hey Pete can you turn on the light?”

“Of course clumsy.” he teases and flips on the light, gasping as I get to my feet.

I look down and pale, “Holy fucking shit.”

A man about in his thirties, dark hair, and bleeding from the head is in the middle of the bus floor.

“I can explain!” Mikey’s voice makes us jump as he stands up from the couch.

I lean down over the guy and check for a pulse, and not finding one, “Pete he’s dead.”

Pete takes in a deep breath, “Mikey start explaining.”

“I-I just, Everyone’s on my bus and you two were gone I didn’t know where else to put him.” Mikey trembles.

“I think he meant explain what made you need to hide a dead fucking body!” I snap.

Pete covers my mouth, “Ignore him, he’s sexually frustrated.”

I glare at him and move his arm, “Mikey, what the fuck?”

Mikey flinches, “He just, he kept grabbing my arm and, he kept trying..to do stuff and I told him to fuck off, but he shoved me against a building and, he was kissing me and there was a loose brick in the wall so I got it out and I hit him in the head. I didn’t know what else to do!”

“So..you decided to drag the guy out in public, heave him onto a bus instead of just walking away and saving your ass? Or oh, why not call the police!” I pull at my hair, “Seriously, you dragging a body is a lot more suspicious than a body just laying around. And now you _can’t_ call the cops because you moved his ass so they’ll think you killed him intentionally and then you just got scared so now you’re trying to say it was self defense.”

“I-I know, okay? I thought about all of that, after I was already here.”

Pete sighs, “Patrick, calm down. Mikey..it’s going to be okay.”

“How the fuck is this going to be okay! He fucking killed someone and put them on _our_ bus!”

“Patrick, shut up!” Pete snaps, “Mikey freaked out, and it’s not something I can’t handle. Just, fucking go to the other bus and we’ll take care of this.”

“Right. So now you’re killing people so you can be alone with _my_ boyfriend?” I glare at Mikey.

“Patrick!” Pete grabs my shoulders, “You being jealous was cute at first, now it’s getting fucking old. In fact, it’s been old for a while. This,” he gestures to the corpse, “has nothing to do with anything between Mikey and I. But this…” he points between us, “It’s been done for a while.”

“Really? Because five minutes ago you were pretty fucking determined to get my clothes off!” I shove him away from me.

He rolls his eyes, “Well now I’m telling you that I’ve been lying through my teeth for a few months now.”

Mikey’s eyes widen, “Pete, I know I told you to tell him but this is really the worst possible time.”

I look between the two of them and the puzzle pieces click together. My jealousy wasn’t something just in my head. I wasn’t imagining the way they flirt. I wasn’t imagining the way their hair and clothes were disheveled when they came back from Starbucks. I grab my phone out of my pocket, glaring at them both.

“P-Patrick please, I know you’re mad you have every right to be but please don’t call the cops.” Mikey bites his lip.

I listen to the phone ring, “I’m not calling the cops. But you’ll wish I did.”

Mikey’s eyes widen.

Pete tries to grab my phone, but I quickly move away.

“Hello?”

“Hey Gerard… I need your help…” I grin at the horrified look on Mikey’s face.

“What’s up Patrick?” he asks, sounding a little worried.

“It’s hard to explain...can you come over to my bus? Um...by yourself. It’s kind of a personal issue I need help with.”

“Um..okay. Just give me a second.” he hangs up.

I stuff my phone into my pocket as Pete shoves me, “Why the fuck would you involve someone else?”

I shrug, “Gerard’s his brother.”

“Which is exactly why-” Pete cuts himself off as the door handle jiggles.

“Patrick?” Gerard’s voice is muffled.

I move Pete aside and unlock the door, opening it a little to make sure Gerard is alone, before letting him in, “Careful on the stairs...and don’t scream.”

Gerard raises an eyebrow before walking up the stairs, then quickly covers his mouth as he sees the body, “What the hell?” he squeaks.

“Ask Mikey.” I snap.

“Oh fuck...Mikey, what the fuck?” Gerard runs his fingers through his hair, listening as Mikey explains, for the second time, “Mikey someone probably saw you. Why didn’t you just-”

“I got the whole why didn’t I do this or that instead speech from Patrick, thanks.” Mikey groans.

“What the fuck are we going to do?” Gerard asks.

“We don’t know yet.” Pete bites his lip.

“Actually, Pete you can drive the bus, yeah?” I look over to him.

He raises an eyebrow, “Yeah..”

“Good, because I have an idea, besides telling Gerard just to upset Mikey.” I lock the bus door.

“We don’t have shovels and we’d look suspicious buying them in the middle of the night.” Pete raises an eyebrow.

“My plan doesn’t need shovels. But we will need trashbags and bleach. Pete, go get the keys, then you and Mikey can go find bleach, because I need time away from you both before there’s two more dead bodies to dispose of.” I grab Gerard’s arm, “If you’re currently sane enough, we’re going to go get trash bags.”

Gerard just nods.

“Good. We have to make sure all the doors are locked so that no one wanders in, four people is enough to know about this. So again, Pete grab the keys so that once we lock ourselves out we can get back in.”

Pete nods and goes to the front of the bus.

Mikey bites his lip, “Patrick, I know you’re mad but-”

“Trust me I’m containing my anger very well. As a side note though, fuck you.” I storm out of the bus.

Gerard follows, closing the door behind him, “Patrick?”

“Yeah?” I look over to him as we walk down the street hoping to find an open store.

“Your phone call was like, absolutely no warning for that.” He sighs.

I bite my lip, “I know, but I couldn’t say your brother killed a guy over the phone…” I look down, “And I’m sorry for involving you. Part of me actually did it because you’re Mikey’s brother and you should know…but most of me just really wanted to piss him off.”

He snorts, “Yeah I noticed the hostility hanging in the air...what’d I miss?”

“Oh, nothing… Mikey and Pete have just been fucking behind my back for who knows how long. Hey, they’re open!” we walk up to a gas station.

“He what?” Gerard’s eyes widen.

I roll my eyes, “You don’t have to cover for him.” I open the door and hold it open for Gerard.

“No… I suspected but I asked him..he said they weren’t.” he walks inside.

I shrug and grab the trash bags, “I suspected too, and my reply from Pete was that I’m cute when I’m jealous over nothing.”

Gerard frowns, “I’m sorry…”

“Mikey was right though, this is a horrible time to tell someone you’ve been cheating on them.” I put the trashbags on the counter and pay before we walk out.

Gerard bites his lip, “Patrick you aren’t-”

“No, I’m not going to say anything to anyone about this. By helping I’m incriminating myself too, so hopefully that’ll be enough to keep him from worrying. I’m pissed, and more upset than I’ve ever been, but I wouldn’t do something like that. I wouldn’t drag Mikey down with something completely unrelated. Another reason I decided to bring you with me is so he wouldn’t panic. You wouldn’t let me call the police even if I wanted to.” I shrug and walk towards the bus, seeing Mikey carrying bleach.

“I can’t say I’d be as reasonable, if it were me...but thanks.” Gerard offers me a half smile.

I nod and wait for Pete to unlock the door before following him inside the bus.

“Okay so what’s the next part of your plan?” Pete asks quietly.

“Put the body in the bag, drive to a bridge, one of the ones over the lake, toss body in water, clean up blood with bleach, drive back, yell at you and Mikey, find somewhere else to sleep, cry myself to sleep, wake up tomorrow and avoid everyone.” I snap and open the trash bags.

“He’s kind of too big to fit in one of them.” Mikey says, looking down.

“I realize that. I have more than one bag here though. Just, Pete start driving. I’ll have it done when we get there. Mikey, go sit up front with Pete because I can’t deal with you right now either. Gerard...mind helping me put a body in trash bags?” 

“Sure…” Gerard shrugs.

Mikey and Pete go to the front.

“I still can’t believe you’re helping them.” Gerard opens up one of the bags, “So how are we going to do this?”

“I knew I’d be hiding a body at some point in my life.” I shrug and stand over the corpse, “Alright, do you want to lift the body or put on the bags?”

“Yeah I’ll take the one that doesn’t involve touching the dead.” he says jokingly.

“That’s why I gave you that option, come here. Get by his head, we’re going to put the top half in the bag first.”

He nods and walks over, getting down on his knees to be low enough, “How do you know he won’t be found?”

I lift him up by his shoulders as Gerard slides the bag over his head, “I don’t, in fact I’m sure that at some point he will. But none of us live here, any evidence of our involvement will be gone after he’s in the water. Well unless someone did see your brother, but if so I think they’d have called the cops by now.” I lift him up more so Gerard can slide the bag further down, “Plus I doubt he’ll be the only body down there.”

Gerard gets the bag two thirds of the way down before he can’t anymore, “Okay that’s it.”

I tighten the strings on the bag and tie them tight before turning and picking up his feet so Gerard can bag them as well. We use all the bags but one, alternating the top and bottom half. I use the last bag to tie around his midsection to keep the other bags firmly in place, panting softly from all the work, “That should do.”

Gerard nods, “I don’t think he could get out if he were alive.” his eyes widen, “Wait, we did check to make sure he’s not, right?”

I nod, “I checked his pulse earlier, nothing.”

He nods, “Okay.”

“Hey, can you ask if we’re almost there? I”m gonna start cleaning up.” I grab the bleach and pour a capful onto the carpet before grabbing a large bowl and putting soapy water in it. I get a rag and dip it into the water before setting the bowl down, ringing out the rag and scrubbing the bus floor. I keep scrubbing as Gerard walks back.

“Hey, we’re on the bridge, pulled off to the side. Mikey’s put the hood up to make it look like we’re having car trouble so we need to be fast.”

I nod, “Well we did this part, I think they could handle the heavy lifting.” I grin and walk to the front of the bus, right as Pete leans in and kisses Mikey, I clear my throat.

They pull apart quickly.

“Patrick-”

“You and Mikey get to lift the heavy dead body and toss it into the water.”

Mikey bites his lip.

“I did the hard part.” I shrug before walking to the back.

They sigh and follow as Gerard opens the door.

“There’s no one on the bridge, now’s the best time.” Gerard says, looking around.

Pete and Mikey each grab an end, struggling under the weight as they walk down the stairs with him. They swing him a few times before getting him high enough to go into the water. He plunges into the water and keeps going down.

“Don’t dead bodies float?” Pete asks as they get back on quickly.

“Sometimes, but He’s weighted down enough he’ll sink.” I wash my hands again.

“Patrick thanks for helping…” Mikey bites his lip.

“Yeah, you’re welcome. And look, me helping incriminates me a fucking lot. So I’m not going to go run and tell the cops about this, I’d be sending myself to jail too. So you don’t have to worry. We should get off the bridge.” 

Pete nods and goes to the front.

Mikey opens his mouth to say something, but I cut him off, “I don’t want to hear what you have to say. I don’t care if you’re sorry. I don’t care if you tried to make him tell me. I don’t fucking care.”

Mikey frowns and looks to Gerard.

“I’m not defending you.” Gerard shakes his head, “You know it was wrong, and when I asked about it you lied, so…”

“I know but-”

“Go up front with Pete. Because right now you two are the only ones who can stand either of your company.” Gerard says with a sad smile, “I still love you and all, and I’ll still hide a body for you, but I don’t really want to talk to you right now.”

Mikey nods and goes up to the front of the bus.

I groan and sit on the couch, tugging my hair.

Gerard gently pulls my arms down, “Calm down.”

“I can’t calm down. I just had to help hide a body and fuck when I was walking to the bus I thought I was actually going to have sex, not reach the end of my relationship and commit a crime.” I groan.

He chuckles, “Well I can’t help with the relationship thing, or the crime thing since someone so nicely dragged me into it...but sex… I can make that happen.”

I blush, “Dude, we just got rid of a body and your brother’s on the bus.”

He grins, “I’m just hearing encouragement.”

I bite my lip, “What the hell?”

I grab the front of his shirt and pull him into a kiss.


End file.
